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Quantization Revision of Murphy's Law: Everything goes wrong all at once.

Quigley's Law: A car and a truck approaching each other on an otherwise deserted road will meet at the narrow bridge.

Quile's Consultation Law: The job that pays the most will be offered when there is no time to deliver the services.

Quinn's Market Theory: An unexpected loss will cancel out an unexpected gain.

R. A. Wilson's Rule: Reality is whatever you can get away with.

R. C. Gallagher's Law: Change is inevitable - except from a vending machine.

Ralph's Observation: It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.

Randall's Law of Automotives: The flat doesn't occur until the day after the tire sale.

Randy's Rule: A ton of anything is ugly.

Rankin's Rule: You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake.

Rap's Law of Inanimate Reproduction: If you take something apart and put it back together enough times,
    eventually you will have two of them.

Raphael's Law of Business: The less the staff has to do, the slower they do it.

Rayburn's Rule: If you want to get along, go along.

Ray's Rule for Precision: Measure with a micrometer. Mark with chalk. Cut with an axe.

Reasner's Law of the Internet: The probability of your browser locking up is directly proportional to how close you are
     to the information that you've been searching for.

Reece's Second Law: The speed of an oncoming vehicle is directly proportional to the length of the passing zone.

Rector's Law of the E-Mail: Typos are not noticed until after the "Send" button has been hit.

Reichart's Internet Law: The button you want to press is the last one that loads.

Reinhardt's Guide to Art: Sculpture is what you bump into when you back up to look at a painting..

R. C. Gallagher's Law: Change is inevitable - except from a vending machine.

Reisner' Rule of Conceptual Inertia: If you think big enough, you'll never have to do it.

Relativity for Children: Time moves slower in a fast moving vehicle.

Rennie's Law of Public Transit: If you start walking, the bus will come when you are precisely halfway between stops.

Reverend Chichester's Laws: 1. If the weather is extremely bad, church attendance will be down. 
  2.
If the weather is extremely good, church attendance will be down. 
  3.
If the bulletin covers are in short supply, church attendance will exceed all expectations.

Reynolds's Law: Wind velocity increases geometrically with the cost of the hairstyle. 
  Law of Climatology:
Wind velocity increases in direct proportion to the cost of the hairdo.
   Law of Medicine: A minor operation is one performed on somebody else.

Richard's Complementary Rules of Ownership: 1. If you keep anything long enough you can throw it away. 
  2
. If you throw anything away, you will need it as soon as it is no longer accessible.

Rick's Rule of Dorm Live: The roommate who gets up earliest has the loudest alarm clock.

Ringwald's Law of Household Geometry: Any horizontal surface is soon piled up.

Rita Mae Brown's Observation: If this were a logical word, men would ride sidesaddle.

Rita's Parking Meter Prediction: The one time you dash in to run an errand without putting money in the parking meter
     is the same time the meter maid appears out of nowhere. 
  Rule:
The one time you don't put money in the meter will coincide with the one daily visit of the meter maid.

Rives's Rule: Everything falls apart on the same day.

Robbie's Philosophy: The world looks better through a rearview mirror.

Robbin's Mini-Max Rule of Government: Any minimum criteria set will be the maximum value used. 
  Rule:
One good reason why computers can do more work than people is that they never have to stop and answer the phone.
  Rules of Marketing: 1. Your share of the market is lower than you think.
    2.
The combined market position goal of all competitors always totals at least 150%. 
    3.
The existence of a market does not insure the existence of a customer.
    4.
Beware of alleged needs that have no real market.
    5.
Low price and long shipment will win over high price and short shipment.
    6.
If a customer buys lunch, you have lost the order.

Robert Anthony's Corporate Dictum: The criteria for determining the value of a committee,
    department or business organization lies not in evaluating its performance but in determining
    what effect it would have if it ceased to perform at all.

Robert's Axiom: Only errors exist. Berman's Corollary: One person's error is another person's data.
  Christmas Rule:
The less mechanically inclined the father, the more likely the child will want something
     that has to be assembled.
  Law of Corporate Management: Title outweighs performance. 
  Rule:
An efficient bureaucracy is the greatest threat to liberty.

Robertson's Law: Quality assurance doesn't. 
  Rule of Bureaucracy:
The more directives you issue to solve a problem, the worse it gets.

Robinson's Law: The guy you beat out of a prime parking spot is the one you have to see for the job interview.

Rob's Air Travel Principle: Distance to the gate increases with the decreasing time to departure.
    Corollary: Security lines increase with decreasing time available.

 
Lament:
As soon as you become familiar with all the shortcuts and secret parking places in town,
      you will be transferred to a different town.
  Rule of Freelancing: After weeks of no work, multiple jobs arrive, all with the same deadline.

Roche's Fifth Law: Every American crusade winds up as a racket.

Rocky's Lemma of Innovation Prevention: Unless the results are known in advance, funding agencies will reject the proposal.

Rogers's Laws: 1. As soon as the stewardess serves the coffee, the airliner encounters turbulence.
       Davis' Explanation:
Serving coffee on an aircraft causes turbulence. 
    2.
If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing. 
  Observation:
In a bureaucratic hierarchy, the higher up the organization, the less people appreciate Murphy's Law,
         the Peter Principle etc..

 Rules: 1. Authorization for a project will be granted only when none of the authorizers can be blamed
          if the project fails but when all of the authorizers can claim credit if it succeeds.
    2. Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there

Roland's Rule of Review Meetings: Regardless of how many statistics and revisions you bring into a meeting,
    someone will request data you deemed to marginal to bring.

Rominger's Rules for Students: 1. The more general the title of a course, the less you will learn from it. 
     2
. The more specific a title is, the less you will be able to apply it later. 
  Rules for Teachers: 1.
When a student asks for a second time if you have read his book report, he did not read the book. 
     2.
If the daily class attendance is mandatory, a scheduled exam will produce increased absenteeism.
            If attendance is optional, a scheduled exam will produce persons you have never seen before.

Ron's Observations for Teenagers: 1. The pimples don't appear until the hour before the date. 
  2.
The scratch on the record is always through the song you like most.

Rooney's Rule: Nothing in fine print is ever good news.

Roosevelt's Rule: When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.

Ross' Law: Never characterize the importance of a statement in advance.

Rostand's Comment: My pessimism extends to the point of even suspecting the sincerity of other pessimists.

Rosten's Observation: Two heads are not better than one if both are stupid.

Rothman's Rule: When things go wrong, don't go with them.

Rowland's Paradox: A good woman is known by what she does; a good man by what he doesn't.

Ruane's Law of Monetary Windfalls: Pennies from heaven are soon followed by a tax collector from hell.
Note taking Notation:
When you need to jot down information received over the telephone,
    the first pen you reach for won't write.

Ruby's Principle of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases
    when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

Ruckert's Law: There is nothing so small that it can't be blown out of proportion.

Rudin's Law: In crises that force people to choose among alternative courses of action,
    most people will choose the worst one possible.

Rudnicki's Nobel Principle: Only someone who understands something absolutely can explain it so no one else can understand it. 
  Rule:
That which cannot be taken apart will fall apart.

Rule of Accuracy: When working toward the solution of a problem, it always helps if you  know the answer.

Rule of Defactualization: Information deteriorates upward through bureaucracies.

Rule of Feline Frustration: When your cat has fallen asleep on your lap and looks utterly content and adorable,
    you will suddenly want to go to the bathroom.

Rule of Intelligent Tinkering: Safe all the parts.

Rule of Political Promises: Truth varies.

Rule of Professional Practice: Once a client is a pain in the neck, that client will always be a pain in the neck.

Rule of the Great: When people you greatly admire and respect appear to be thinking deep thoughts,
    they are probably thinking about lunch.

Rule of the Open Mind: People who are resistant to change cannot resist change for the worst.

Rules of Environmental Protection: 1. The species is protected only after it is hopelessly depleted. 
  2.
The most efficient way to dispose of toxic waste is to reclassify the waste as non-toxic.
  3. (The Catalytic Converter Principle): Anything done to improve one area of the environment
        will cause corresponding damage in another area.

Rules of Ownership: 1. If you keep anything long enough, you can throw it away. 
2
. If you throw anything away, you will need it as soon as it is no longer accessible.
Erbenich's Extension:
If you keep it and you need it, you won't be able to find it.

Runamok's Law: There are four kinds of people: those who sit quietly and do nothing,
    those who talk about sitting quietly and doing nothing, those who do things, and those who talk about doing things.

Rune's Rule of the Road: If you don't care where you are, you ain't lost.

Runyon’s Law: Life is six to five against.

Rush's Rule of Gravity: When you drop change at a vending machine,
    the pennies will fall nearby while all other coins will roll out of sight.

Rusk's Law of Delegation: Where an exaggerated emphasis is placed upon delegation,
    responsibility, like sediment, sinks to the bottom.

Russel on Patriotism: Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons.

Russell's Observation: The point of philosophy is to start with something so simple as to seem not worth stating,
    and to end with something so paradoxical that no one will believe it.
  on Patriotism: Patriotism is the willingness to kill and be killed for trivial reasons. 
  Rule:
Don't worry about avoiding temptation - as you grow older, it starts avoiding you.

Russ's Law of Assembly: The thing that holds the whole thing together will be missing.

Ryan's Law: Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish yourself as an expert.
Application of Parkinson's Law:
Possessions increase to fill the space available for their storage.

 

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This page was last updated on 03 August, 2018